Friday, October 5, 2012

update..why I haven't been updating a lot..

Sorry guys for not updating..I feel like lately I've just been posting more and more of these "updates". I feel like it's time for me to let it all out.. The real truth is in the past 2 years I've been dealing with a lot. From another break up to a lot of health issues..from one surgery to countless failed treatments..its all been a lot and I kinda lost the passion for everything I once loved. During those times I gained a lot of weight..well (30 pounds) to some that's not a lot but for me it was. I wasn't myself, I was feeling down and depressed..I was hanging out with certain people that were doing me more harm than good. After the first breakup things went downhill with me and my health. I was with someone for almost 5 years, we were engaged for a while..things happened that really hurt me but now that's done and over with. After that I dated for a while nothing serious and then I got more serious with another guy for 2 years. Now during that time I started experiencing all these health issues. It first started with my psoriasis which was very minimal at the time, and then my gallbladder attacks kept happening once or twice a year and I kept getting mis-diagnosed. Doctors kept telling me its just food poisoning. (this has been happening for 7 years but got worse with time..and the attacks I will mentione are the attacks during the last two years not the ones that Ive been having since 2003) I ended up in the hospital 2 times ( I was rushed with ambulance- and they still made me wait 13 hrs the first time and 15 the second) My first time that I decided to go to the hospital from this attack was right after my wisdom tooth surgery and I called ambulance and was taken to the hospital and admitted after 13 hrs but I was in pain for at least 15 prior to getting admitted..I had 3 different doctors look at me..and they just checked my one cared to do an ultrasound test. ( oh and my doctor did not want to send me for tests for ultra sound because he thought it was not needed ). After this I had 2 more attacks in one month. I was rushed to the hospital again during my friends wedding and waited 15 hrs..I was in excruciating pain..I was throwing up a lot and I started throwing up blood..I went to the receptionist and she just told me to calm down and have a seat like everyone this point I was beyond pissed off with their horrible service and I decided to leave since she said it would be another 2-3 hr I just went home and suffered for another 2 hrs and then the pain went away. After this I went to a different doctor and told him what has been happening and asked him to send me for an ultrasound ..Few weeks later II did my ultrasound and it turned out I had severely infected gallbladder stones that were blocking the bile that neeeded to be removed right away so they scheduled me a surgery. After that I kept having turns out that my psoriasis has now turned into psoriatic arthritis and it started attacking my joints..I started experiencing swelling at first (which again was kept telling me its just because of the humidity..and so on..after he diagnosed me with psoriatic now the swelling became permanent..and started affecting more joints..I started experiencing stiffness..pain..this started getting worse in the one point I could not feet were ankles were constantly swollen I couldnt walk or wear closed toe shoes.. my back hurt a lot..this not only affected me affected me mentally, emotionally and it started affecting my relationship with my boyfriend at the time and my family and friends..I was not able to do much, I was grumpy because I was in pain and I was upset about all this happening to me.Since I couldnt do much I started gaining weight..First I was put on naproxen for 6 months that didnt work then I tried some other pills..than I tried Chinese medicine for a while..I started feeling better but the swelling was sstill there..I was on methotraxate for a while but I stopped that because I was extremely tired everyday and started getting lumps/boils on the back of my neck...I was so scared of the side effects that I decided to stop..things were good off and on.. I was told I had to start biogical treatment which include Humira, Enbrel and so on but those are wayy to expensive and not covered ..For a while things went back to normal I was feeling great I was able to walk again - pain free..I was back to work..I even started working out ..and then BAM this summer inflammation attacked me again..this time it spread to my knees, my neck..shoulders..I could not get up off to got so much a lot of my fingers are swollen..some of my toes are back was all swollen..I couldnt breathe in the morning..and at felt like my muscles were so tense and inflammed that they were pushing on my lungs..I went to the doctor again he kept saying it is normal im ok..he wouldnt do any tests...after this i scheduled an appointment wiht my rheumatologist and he was the one that sent me for xrays. Turns out the inflammation got I had suspected ( well most of it was super obvious since it was visible on my body. I decided to start going for acupuncture and chiropractor and that has helped me sooooo much. I can't even describe how much it has helped me..I went from not being able to walk at all..or even getting up to walking again and beign able to get up pain free..I had to stop a few weeks ago because since nothing is covered I slowly started using up all of my now I have to take a break..I'm hoping I can find some insurance company with good deals so at least some of my chiropractor appointments will be covered and I wish all those meds would be covered so I can start treating this disease that is affecting my life along with so many people who experience the same issues. So since Thanksgiving is approaching soon..for both Canadians and Americans..I also want to express my gratitude for my health and remind everyone that taking care of yourself is so important because without your health you really don't have much. It affects everything..the way you think ..react to u view life..your feelings..emotions and so on..Please appreciate it..I am forever thankful for feeling better..because before I didn't really appreciate it gettting up in the morning would be a hassle because I was I am just thankful I can get up without pain so I dont have to pop a few pills just to be able to get up off my bed and walk downstairs... Be thankful..for your health and well being..there are people out there waking up every day in pain and living with pain everyday..and a lot of them seem to be more thankful than most of the cancer patients..they always seem so grateful for things..we should be don't forget to give GOD your thanks for everything you are blessed for in your life..always look for things you have and are blessed with Now on the brighter side..I started methotraxate again since it is the only thing I could afford at the moment..Been feeling better at least I can get up with minor pain..joints hurt at night usually and in the morning (swelling still there),,most of the time I can open the water bottle..because for the longest time I was unable to turn the door knob and even struggled with opening my own waterbottle..but things are better..i am being hopeful..and if anyone know of anyways I can get some discounts on any of those meds mentioned it would be greatly appreciated can leave a comment or shoot me an e-mail


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